Why Children Have Tantrums (And What Actually Helps)

Many parents experience moments when their child suddenly becomes overwhelmed with emotions. A small situation can quickly turn into crying, shouting, or refusing to cooperate.

These situations can feel stressful, but tantrums are actually a normal part of child development.

Understanding why children have tantrums helps parents respond in ways that support emotional growth instead of increasing conflict.

What happens in the child's brain

Young children are still developing the parts of the brain responsible for impulse control and emotional regulation.

When a child becomes overwhelmed, the emotional part of the brain becomes highly activated. In this moment the child cannot easily think logically or respond to explanations.

This is why reasoning with a child during a tantrum often does not work.

Why emotions feel so strong for children

For adults, a situation may seem small.

For the child, the emotion can feel very big.

Children experience frustration, disappointment, and anger more intensely because their emotional regulation skills are still developing.

What parents can do

Helpful responses include:

• staying calm
• acknowledging the child’s feelings
• giving the child time to calm down

Over time these experiences help children develop emotional regulation.

Learn more

If you want a deeper understanding of children's emotions and practical tools for everyday parenting, explore our guide Understanding Your Child.